Why make a contract?
Some people choose to write down an agreement about how they want to be together, instead of leaving it unsaid. This page explains what such a contract can be used for.
1. Agreeing on expectations
Writing down an agreement requires you to say things plainly: who does what, what is acceptable and what is not. Many expectations only become clear when they have to be put into words.
2. Clarity
What is written down can be read again. That makes it easier to remember what you agreed, and to see whether you still agree.
3. Review and change
The form covers how the agreement can be changed and ended. An agreement can be changed. Once a contract has been sent for signing it cannot be changed, so if you want to change something, you create a new contract.
4. Security in the conversation
The form covers limits, safeword, health and aftercare. Talking this through in advance can make it easier to speak up later. It is an aid to the conversation, not a guarantee that anything is safe.
5. You do not have to sign
You can use the form only as a basis for a conversation. The draft can be downloaded, and the contract can be printed without anything being signed digitally.